The Last Post

It took several days to plan, prepare and hang my exhibition for assessment.
I used a small studio in the Fine Art area, having asked Michael Wright for permission to use it.
Having painted the walls and prepared the boxes for mounting, i began hanging the silk panels.
I decided that they should form 'walls' to cause the viewer to walk a certain path that was quite narrow and 'hemmed in'
I hung the panels on fishing wire with magnetic hooks attached to the ceiling.

My sister came up to help me. She said that the panels needed to be lower as they were not 'In your face' enough. so we spent a long time cutting new lengths of line, getting up and down off a table to measure, adjust, attach and re-hang them.

I am very pleased with the final height as they do feel very close as you walk between them.

I wanted to create a sense of being overpowered by these menacing images full of unpleasant objects. 

The panels waft and flutter as you walk by them which adds an unsettling atmosphere too.

We then measured and marked an eye-line for the wall-mounted images.

I banged in some 6 inch nails , leaving 4 inches to attach the mounting boxes. I measured and made holes in the back of the boxes and pushed them onto the nails.

I then removed them and stuck the 4 images onto the fat surface of the boxes.

I mounted two wall images in the gap between the silk hangings, so that they would seem to hang there as you walk past the first hanging.

Here you can see the wall-mounted images places in the opening between the two silk hangings. You can also see that the centre of this wall image is at exactly my eye-level.

Once I had attached the box mounted images, I stuck two final images onto foam board and attached them to the walls either side of the doorway, hidden behind the silk screens. I hope it will cause a little surprise of discovery as the viewer walks round the space. it is to say "you can't get away from us, we will always be part of your life and will land on you when you don't expect us!'
Once everything was mounted, I thought it would be good to bring in a fan so that the panels seemed to move independently. I managed to drop the plug behind the stud wall and plug it in. Then I clipped it to the top of the wall panel at the back of the space. I am very pleased with the effect.

I have set out the little perspex boxes and the card index box on the plinth at the far end of the space. I hope they will create a 'draw' for the eye, so that the viewer catches sight of other images at the last minute, so they are suddenly 'there'. Wherever you stand in the space, there is a sense of being surrounded by work you can see or that is hidden. I wanted to create a feeling of not being quite relaxed, but slightly uneasy at all times.

I am happy with the final dissemination of my work as it looks good, the images are of high quality and I  have built the phenomenological sensation of dis-ease and malevolence  in the space. I also think the 'Seduction/ Repulsion' effect is there too.

I would like an enclosed space for the Final M.A Show in the Gallery in October to create this same sensation.

Final Feedback from Tutorial on 26.08.2014

I met with Peter Suchen, an artist and critic and Rebecca Thomas at Hatfield house for a final Tutorial.

With Peter, I discussed my artist's statement, and apart from a question about first or third person, he felt it was clear and concise and expressed everything a viewer would need to understand and appreciate my exhibition. He though that the way I planned to set out the room would create a fitting sense of being 'overpowered' and 'unsettled' by the work. Peter suggested that I mat be trying to include too many separate images, so I will think carefully about that factor when I put them up.

We discussed how in the future, I would like to start selling images and he felt that in the right galleries, they would sell. I felt quite content after this meeting that I had done as much preparation as I needed to and that I had made sound aesthetic choices. I am glad that I got more images printed than I will need, so I have a variety to select from. I cannot make those decisions until I start putting the work in place and see how they look together.

With Rebecca, I discussed the assessment criteria and LOM to make sure I had interpreted them correctly. It was reassuring that we reached similar understandings. Rebecca was able to make additional suggestions that were useful. The main input I got from this tutorial was a confirmation of my  drive to constantly improve, refine and push forward my original ideas from the proposal stage, right up to now. I feel confident about the quality of my work and its appeal and effect on others. I think I have achieved what I planned and suggested in my proposal.
I have not included sound effects or an overlay of film because that proved too complex and time-consuming in the given time scale. I adapted the planned idea of a  'Cabinet of Curiosities',  by collecting together the objects used; documenting, explaining and displaying them in little boxes.
I am also planning to make silk scarves with my designs in the future, and Rebecca felt this medium would work well.
Overall, I am content that I have worked very hard over the M.A course. I have been able to maintain a high work rate, producing complex intricate images, despite many distractions and problems. I have completed all assignments on time and to the best of my ability and am able to look back with pride on what I have achieved.

New Learning over the FMP Process(500 wds)

When I embarked on the Final Major project, I was still learning by experimentation and making mistakes. I enjoyed working in the darkroom, getting 'lost' for hours with experimental processes. I would get so excited, I would just rush forward, without thinking about my desired outcome or bothering to record the process for future reference. Now I am much better organised and have learnt to curb my enthusiasm long enough to write details of exposure time, filters and Fstops on the back of each image.
In this way I am able to repeat effects I like. I have definitely taught myself to think ahead to what I want to produce and how it will meet set assessment criteria. I regularly refer to my initial Gannt Chart for the FMP and check that I am on track with the weekly schedule. I think I have become a more professional practitioner.
I started the M.A course with very little knowledge or skill in digital processes. I was thinking in analogue and 'hands-on' manner and trying to translate that into digital processes.

I was very lucky to be working with Creative Arts students, who were all very generous with their time and expertise when I got stuck on something. As I work with dyslexic students, they are excellent at explaining new techniques to a slow learner like me! They knew exactly how important it was to allow me to learn the new skill with my hands on the keyboard, with them talking to me. That must make me a combination of a Kinaesthetic and auditory learner. I recorded instructions on my phone and wrote them up afterwards, so I have my own 'crib sheets.' They give me confidence.

I also loved regularly sharing work, and having discussions about theories, new artists and ideas with my students, friends and peers. This proved a rich and valuable learning experience. We were able to inspire each other, give useful feedback and make new suggestions.
Examples of posts from my blog about new learning:

Printing onto silk
Clone stamp
Holger Putin Tutorial
Polygon tool
Flipping horizontal and Vertical
Hanging and wall mounting
responding to work of others

If I were to analyse my learning processes:

I LOOK at work of other artists--- and try to RECREATE it in a new way, learning the necessary skills.

I READ about theories, or the thoughts and practises of other practitioners

---and try to EXPRESS my own interpretation using similar techniques and processes.

I FEEL  an emotional response to what I see or read --- and try to represent or evoke that same feeling in my work, experimenting with new methodologies and testing it out on others.

Over all, I have taught myself to work in a more structured, efficient  way, recording techniques, ideas and people as I go along. I feel I have learnt a lot about how I learn best and what had obstructed my learning process in the past. I try hard now to follow the new structures I have put in place.

Creative Decision Making over the FMP Process (500 wds)

Creative Decision Making

Several key theories underpin the creative decision making for my Final Major Project.
I have built on my understanding of Julia Kristeva’s theory of the Abject (Kristeva, 1982). In an attempt to interpret what we find abject as humans, I have developed my own personal response. I studied artists who used the abject in their work in order to make a serious point or relay a message.
The idea that there were common global elicitors of disgust also fed into my work and influenced decisions I made. (Rozin Et al.1994)
I wanted to refer to the idea of 'Aura’ surrounding an original piece of art due to the touch of the artist, first suggested by Walter Benjamin (Benjamin, 1969). So chose to print onto silk, then prepare the fabric for hanging, which involved a lot of hands-on input from me, ensuring my work had an aura of its own. I was also influenced by the idea of an image having a ‘Punctum’ described by Rowland Barthes (1981) as something within a photographic image, which caught and held the viewer’s eye making an almost physical, emotional connection. Through the selection and combination of shapes, colours and composition, I tried to create an image that drew the eyes to a central ‘void’, point of focus or vanishing point which became the initial ‘punctum’ of the image.
I chose to create symmetrical pieces from several manipulated sections, partly to mask the nature of the objects I was using and partly again to draw the eye. It seems that balanced proportions are pleasing to humans and are present in the creative arts of most cultures and eras. (Hahn, 1998)
I made creative choices based on my study of Old Dutch Masters’ still life paintings of flowers, fruit, insects and skulls from the 17th Century such as Willem Kalf and Jan Davidsz de Heem.
I incorporated their theme of the transience of beauty; giving way to decay and death as represented by the creeping insect and skull symbolism.
I researched other artists in the field of photography in order to better understand and create work that caused a ‘Seduction/Repulsion’ effect.
The use of bright colours, simple symmetrical design and balanced composition in the work of Gilbert and George (1994,2014) have a mesmeric effect on the viewer, holding the attention much like a stained glass window in a church. It is not until closer, more detailed study that you realise there are quite unsettling objects and messages in the images. I chose to produce work with a serious message cloaked in a seductive first impression.
Many artists have used their art as a form of therapy. This has influenced the creative decision making in my Final Major Project. Artists such as Louise Bourgeois, Cindy Sherman, Tracy Emin and Yayio Kusama have all used personal experiences to inform and shape their work. Making the choice to use personal material, I too have added deeper meaning and weight. The psychology of ‘facing your demons’ described as ‘Acceptance and Commitment Therapy’ (Harris, 2014) also influenced the decision to represent all my ‘demons’ symbolically.
As a result of the creative decisions I have made concerning dissemination for exhibition, I have produced work that is glossy and attractive. The silk hangings are positioned in such a way that they move and flutter close to the viewer, making the experience haptic and sensual. The glossy paper images are slightly hidden, in a restricted space, so have to be sought out for closer consideration. The symbolic objects within the images then reveal themselves, causing a jolt. The aim is to share something of the shock and distress of some of my life experiences.



Bibliography

Barthes, R. (1981) ‘Camera Lucida-Reflections on Photography’
New York: Hill and Wang


Benjamin, Walter, (1969) ‘The Work of Art in the Age of Mechanical Reproduction.’ In Illuminations, New York: Schocken Books) 221.


Gilbert and George
‘Naked Shit Pictures’ (1994)Available at: ‪www.southlondongallery.org/page/gilbert-george-the-naked.‬..‬‬‬
‘Scapegoating Pictures for London’(2014) Available at:
‪whitecube.com/exhibitions/gilbert_george_scapegoating..‬[ both accessed 8 August 2014]‬‬‬

Haidt Et al (1994)  ‘Individual Differences in Sensitivity: A Scale Sampling Seven Domains of Disgust Elicitors’  Journal of Personality and individual Differences
 (4. 16.)

Hahn, W. (1998) ‘Symmetry as a Developmental Principle in Nature and Art’ Germany: Art & Science Research Institute.

Harris, R. (2014) ‘Embracing your demons: an overview of acceptance and commitment Theory’ Available at: actskills.com/articles/embracing-your-demons-an-overview..‬[accessed 20. August 2014]

Kristeva, J. (1982) ‘Powers of Horror: An essay on Abjection’ Leon, S. Roudiez (Translator) New York: Columbia University Press

Rozin, P., Haidt, J., & McCauley, C. R. (2008). Disgust. In M. Lewis, J. M. Haviland-Jones & L. F. Barrett (Eds.), Handbook of emotions, 3rd ed. (pp. 757-776). New York: Guilford

More Planning and Preparation

I am in the studio again thinking about how to show my work. I have decided to print another two fabric hangings so that the viewer feels a little overawed and intimidated (hopefully)

 I measured the studio and am thinking about how to make the most impact with the space I have.

I am going to create a corridor down the centre of the room, using the hangings as 'false walls'.
I will then place an image behind each hanging so that you have to walk behind it to see the image.
I may place a third image on each side wall, in the gap between the hangings. That will draw the viewer towards it and make them aware of the images hidden behind. I hope to evoke the feeling that  I cannot escape my shit, and that it is always there, hidden in the background, waiting to come crashing into my life again.

I have also been painting cardboard boxes that I want to use to mount some of the paper images on.
I am also painting the walls and plinth ...

Once these are dry, I will experiment by sticking the image to the largest side and attaching the box to the wall. I want to give the impression of the images 'hanging' in the same way as the fabric.

Reflection and Evaluation Workshop 13/08/14

The M.A Media group had a workshop with Ian Willcock about  our preparation for the final assignment of our course of study today.

Today we looked in more detail at the assessment criteria and details of the brief. As well as a powerpoint presentation, Ian organised pair and group sessions which really helped to involve me actively in discussing the objectives, thinking about them, and finding solutions. The whole session suited the way I learn, as it was fast-paced and divided into several different tasks and formats.

I need to prepare a presentation evaluating my final project by 2nd September, have my work up in the studio for assessment,  and make sure I have completed my blog according to specified requirements  by 16.00 on Wednesday 3rd September.
I also have to include two 500 word posts in my blog:
 one reflecting on my creative decision making,
 and the other on the process of learning new skills during the course of my Final Major Project.

To begin with I found it difficult to separate out these two elements as I tend to combine them. When I learn something new, I want to experiment by taking my work in a different direction. Alternatively,   when I want to try  something that I have seen at an exhibition, I seek out the skills necessary to do it.

Reflection and Evaluation
Reflection is a very personal process which questions what I have done, how it made me feel, what I was good or bad at and how I might have done things differently. This questioning process should lead me to be a more self-aware practitioner.
Evaluation is a far more academic, structured and objective process. I need to establish justifiable criteria to apply to my artefact and do so with reference to underpinning research and evidence to support my judgements.

The pair activity was in the form of an interview about each other's work. The questions I chose to ask were 'stepping off points' which lead to an interesting discussion. It was interesting to see the passion and excitement generated by talking about our own work.

My most fruitful questions were:

What or who was the inspiration for your work?

What was the most difficult part?

What was the message you were trying to express?

Do you think it 'works'?

When we shared questions with another pair, and then heard from the other groups, I realised that I had not looked ahead at the end purpose of this exercise,  and geared my  questions towards the assignment criteria. I had not included questions about documentation and time management, feedback and how you used it, new skills learnt and creative decision making.
My original questions were more about reflection.

I realised that once I had established a full range of suitable questions, they could form the 'bones'  of my written reflection and evaluation.

As a result of this workshop I have set myself several tasks:

1. Look back through my blog posts and make notes under:

a) Creative Decision Making

b) New Learning

c) Placing my work at the forefront

2. Check the Assessment criteria,  make sureI know the requirements,
 then tick them off as they are met

3. Start thinking about criteria I will use to evaluate my own work

4. Begin to plan my presentation

I usually make these kind of 'To Do' lists in my note book, but felt it was important to evidence this aspect of my own methodology and management of time and tasks in a blog post that can be used as an example for two of the learning outcomes 'manage self….' and '..make good use of time and resources…'

Wall Mounting Considerations

I would like to mount the paper images on the walls of the studio with as little around them to distract the audience as possible. So, no frame or border, or obvious sign of fixing to the wall.

I saw some very big pieces of work in the Chapman Lounge, in the main Building of College Lane,  which were mounted onto blocks of wood about 5 centimetres deep. The work was bigger than the mount behind, so it seemed to 'float' off the wall. A similar construction for my work would almost push the image towards the audience more, creating an unsettling sense of proximity and perhaps intimidation.

There is about 3 c. m of 'overhang' on each edge of the work, so the means of mounting and attachment to the wall are not visible.
The work had no details with it so I cannot credit the artist here.

I found an A3 paper box, and experimented with it as a form of attachment for an A2 image.

I quite like the effect here as from front-on the image is suspended at eye level. The parts of the image that are not supported by the backing box may bend or warp slightly, so I ay have to think about building little struts attached to the box that add rigidity to the whole of the image.

A some angles, the box behind the image will be visible, if only glanced as the viewer is moving round the room. so the finish and quality of the surface will need to be more uniform and look solid. I could make it firmer by attaching wide tape round every side, then paint it with white emulsion so that it disappears into the white wall in the background.

These images also highlight the added problem of light bouncing off the glossy surface of the image causing the detail to be distorted or blocked out. I may be able to soften or diffuse the light source in some ay to prevent this effect.

When the image is viewed from directly in front, there is no light flare on the surface. I like the simplicity of this method of mounting.

I found some A3 storage boxes that were being thrown away, so I was able to have 10 of them. They are more substantial than the one featured above, and once painted may form a perfect, rigid support and mount for the paper images.

The depth is about 7 c.m so the 'floating' effect will be even more prominent.

I will probably have to glue all the sides together to ensure the support remains rigid. Then I will paint them with white emulsion. It is very important that the images are all suspended at exactly the same height. I want to create a sense of 'order' and 'control' just as I have within the images themselves. I think two screws fixed just smaller than the width of the top edge of the box would enable me to push the box mount onto the screws, then they will be invisible. 

I have researched the average eye-level height of men and women which is 160 c.m. (www.google.uk) I will temporarily attach an image at the height and get some feedback from peers.

Wearing my Work

Holgar Putin, the visiting freelance commercial photographer commented on the haptic nature of my images on fabric. He also said that although I fixed 'All My Shit' onto the surface of the fabric, because of the way I handled it and stored it, it was still part of me.
Of course, this is true; no matter how I disseminate the symbol-heavy pieces, the actual reality of what the work represents will still be with me and a part of me.
I considered presenting the results of my enquiry in the form of a performance installation where I dress myself in the silky fabric, then pack it away again, as if to say ' I have all these stressors, but if I look at them long and hard and try to see beauty in them, I can then pack them away again and leave them be for a while'

Wearing All my Shit 

Wearing all my shit I

However, I would like to include still glossy images on paper, perhaps positioned on the wall behind the silk hanging, so the viewer moves round the fabric to see what is behind. That way , they also get to see the image from the back.

Further Dissemination considerations

I know that I have to think very carefully about the reasoning behind the way I choose to display my final work.
There has to be consideration of the effects I am attempting to produce and the message of my work. How can I show that I am drawing attention to negatives but in a beautiful way? How can I show the contrast between seductive, bright images and the hidden menace and abjection within them?
How do I evoke a sense of disgust and perhaps empathy with the issues I am exploring?

I like the idea of the hepatic nature of the silk squares; the fact that the negative objects symbolising "All My Shit' are drawn out of me and onto the smooth surface of the fabric. But they are still part of me and will continue to assert an influence. So the piece of silk which I unfold carefully from its bag, like an object of clothing, then handle and caress, display, then re-package, better represents the relationship with my demons than perhaps the A2 images can? I can take a long look at what upsets me and perhaps see the positive side of them, the beauty and calm I have created by manipulating them, then re-package my 'shit' and put it out of sight. This is a Mindfulness 'Behaviour Therapy' technique called 'Acceptance and Commitment Therapy'
R.Harris (2006) 'Psychotherapy in Australia' (vol: 12. No 4 )

The viewer moving closely between and brushing against the bright symmetrical silk hangings may be delighted by the experience. Then they make their way towards the shelf of containers at the far end of the room. Once they have proceeded into the more enclosed space, read the index cards which explain the significance of each symbol contained in the images and looked at the samples contained in transparent labeled draws they will have a clearer understanding of the subject matter and its influence.

Holger Pootin Tutorial.

Had a very useful Photoshop session with this experienced and very knowledgeable tutor.
Unfortunately, it is quite late in my 2 year M.A course, with only weeks until the final assessment to start applying all of the tools he showed me, as I need to allow time for printing and mounting.

However, I can apply some of the tips and I will use them in the future. I have had problems when printing when the colours on my laptop screen are not the same as those that are printed. This is a simple thing to fix, but I have taught myself Photoshop, and didn't know this before. As long as the laptop and the printer I will be using are calibrated to the same settings I will never have this problem again.

I learnt how to prepare a raw image before opening it in Photoshop. In the past, I would just check the image was O.K and open it in Photoshop. The 'temperature' slider is particularly useful to change the lighting from a cooler blue tone to a warm yellow/orange tone.

I also learnt about an effect called 'Moire' which I know as a kind of  'watered silk'. In digital photography however,  this is the blurring almost psychedelic effect that can occur on pattern in an image. Holger showed us the blur filter that can remove Moire.

In photoshop, Holger went through the various adjustments in the process of creating the best image we can.

Holger gave me feedback on one of the printed fabric pieces I have made for my assessment. He liked the way it was something that I brought in a bag, unwrapped and held up. I wasn't planning to make my assessment a performance piece, but that is an interesting idea. He said that I had got out all my negatives onto the fabric, but I had not escaped from them; they are still part of me. The fabric, that is held and handled shows this.

he also talked about how the symmetry and colours of the image were mesmerising and drew your eye into it, only to be confronted by the actual subject matter of the image, formally unseen. he mentioned the attraction/ repulsion quality of the piece. This was very positive for me as that is the feeling I am trying to create. 

Holger went on to question why I would also have images printed on paper as part of the exhibit. he thought that silk hangings, that the viewer had to move through, touching and feeling the silk, would be more effective. I have ordered 10 A1 prints, so the prospect of paying for them and not using them and then doing more fabric prints is a bit daunting. However, I understand his view and see how valid it is. I will have to wait until the prints arrive and see how they look on the walls in combination with the fabric hangings.

Hanging Experiments

I have two images printed onto silk which I want to use to form a kind of 'funnel' leading the viewer into the room.
I hope that the movement of people in the space will cause the hangings to flutter and move around.

Once the viewer works out the objects within the image, this movement may create a sense of disease.

I bought magnetic hooks as the false ceiling of the studio is held in place with metal strips.
I also have transparent nylon thread and small bulldog clips.

I hung one of the images using the panels making up the wall as a guide. This one I tried without any thread between the hook and the clip.

And the second one:-

Here I have used nylon thread between the hook and clip. This one seems to be less droopy than the first. It is so important to hang them both exactly the same to maintain symmetry which is a key feature in my work.

I can see several faults with these hanging methods:

The images are too high, and need to be below the level of the top edge of the enclosing wall. As it is at this height, the harsh light from the ceiling shines through the fine fabric, making it more difficult to see.

Secondly, the fabric is too droopy and forms the shape of two 'wings'. I think I would prefer it to be straighter. I may have to thread a bamboo pole though the top edge to make it stiffer.

The thread is also too flexible and not strong enough. I have to get fishing nylon which is stronger.

This is the view looking out of the studio. I can see how much better it would look if they were hung lower and closer to the eye level of the viewer.

I plan to attach the images printed on paper to the walls all at the same level. I am considering fixing them to foam board of about 2 cm in depth. This is so that they stand proud of the wall, but there will be no frame distracting the viewers. I am waiting for 10 images to be printed, 5 on glossy paper, 5 on Matt. I plan to fix 3 to each side wall and 4 across the back wall.

I plan to have a small plinth as a shelf in the centre of the back wall which will hold the little drawers of objects and the box file of information about the objects in the images.

 I will have to think carefully about the relationship between the separate images and different surface effects. The light may bounce off the glossy ones, which will determine where in the studio they should be placed. I also need to consider the effect I am trying to create as you move  into and through the space.

July 2014 Review

• Definition of 'The Forefront'
• 
  
• Examples of artists at the forefront of my field
• 
  
• Thoughts on display and final presentation

• Picnic Interlude

I have achieved what I had planned for by this stage in my initial Gannt chart. I now have thinking time to dedicate to the dissemination of my work.

Picnic Exhibition

As a follow-on from our away day at Hatfield House, Rebecca has set up an exhibition for the M.A Photography group. I am quite pleased she chose my image for the invite.

It was nice to have a day focusing on something other than my FMP. This was fun and positive.

More Labels

The Paper tags do not have enough room on them to record all the detail I want. So I have experimented with my lovely DYMO printing machine which produces labels with a vintage feel. These are reminiscent of dusty old objects in museum cases. I think this will be perfect for the labelling
of all my objects.

I wonder if there might be health and safety stipulations about putting these kinds of materials on public display? Perhaps I should seal the drawers so they cannot be opened?

lightboxes and wallpaper?

Earlier in this blog, I made a lightbox as a possible means of displaying my images.
It was not successful as the individual LED lights showed through the paper and the light was not dispersed enough. Since then I have seen another photographer's work displayed in the Photographers' Gallery which has made me think again.

                                Price 'Saturated' 2014

This artist has made wallpaper from her kaleidoscopic, symmetrical images, then mounted further images in lightboxes over the backdrop of wall pattern. The work in the boxes looks 'finished' and packaged up. That would work with my attempts to subdue and control the negatives in my life: to contain them even further by sealing them into a frame and causing a light to shine through them like on a slide under a microscope.
The printing of images repetitively into wallpaper  creates an overload of pattern, making your head spin with the repetitive design.
Would it be plagaerism if I used the idea of wallpaper with my own designs? In that way, the idea of not being able to escape from 'All my shit' could be expressed. If the room was papered with a repetitive pattern that was overpowering and quite uncomfortable it would give the sense of it being all around me and inescapable. Or would wallpaper diminish the effect and cause the viewer not to examine it in detail, but just see it as a 'background'?
www.thephotographersgallery.org.uk

Another artist at the forefront

Emily Price is a new graduate from Nottingham trent university.
Her work was exhibited at the Photographers' Gallery in the 'Fresh faced and Wild eyed' collection recently. She could be considered an artist at the forefront as she has combined several techniques and processes in a new way. She uses photographs, collage and digital manipulation to create mesmerising patterns that disguise the serious or disturbing subject matter of her images. My heart dropped when I saw Emily's work as it is very similar to my own!

Emily Price 'Saturation' series

In this image, Emily has used images of people from a protest march and manipulated them into an attractive symmetrical pattern. She has then printed a continuous roll of the image onto fabric.

I have also printed large versions of my images onto fabric!

I like the way the fabric is displayed like it is in a shop and the assistant has thrown out a length for the customer to examine!

Beth Coles 'Mother' 2014

At The Forefront

What is it that puts work at the forefront? In art it could be said that nothing is new. But the process of using something 'old' to make something 'new' could be a simple definition of creativity which is what results in work considered to be 'at the forefront' . So work that looks at a well known theme from a new perspective, or that pushes the practice forward with new techniques or technologies will be at the cutting edge, or forefront.

We need to be able to show knowledge and understanding of work in the forefront of our field. We also need to be able to see how that work connects or relates to our own.
I like to think that these criteria are built into the way I work with this blog. I am constantly looking out for new ideas, new techniques, new artists in the creative field, in which light I consider my own work.
I read reviews in journals, newspapers and on social media and go to lots of exhibitions. The photographers' Gallery and University exhibitions are good for new graduates' exhibitions.
 Social media is particularly good for seeing new cutting edge work. I look at curated sites for contemporary artists like www.axisweb.org and flavorwire.com which is a site for cultural news and commentary. Another good source of forefront work is sites for DIY publication of photography like DIYor die which is an open submission site.

Work that I have been looking at recently is in new exhibitions. For example:

Gilbert and George have launched a new Exhibition 'Scapegoating Pictures for London' at the White Cube Gallery. They act like modern day Hogarths in the way that they document and represent the modern urban environment of London, where they live.
In the curator's notes at the White Cube Gilbert and George's work is described as having a 'Tireless, emotional and profound engagement with the viewer and the modern world'
Although these two have been making work for decades, they still remain at the forefront as they produce fresh perspectives with every exhibition. They represent what is happening in the streets around them and record changes and new trends, like the changing demographic of the residents, drug use and violence.

This image features the two artists looking on at what they see in their neighbourhood: the typically 'English' menu at the Astro Star cafe, the women in burkas, and the laughing gas canisters thrown into the street. This image is set out in a rigid grid and is manipulated into a balanced, symmetrical form.
In my work, I force symbolic objects from my own life  into a symmetrical pattern on the image. It is almost a way of controlling the unpleasant or threatening elements, making them submit. I can draw this similarity between the work of Gilbert and George and my own. Another similarity is the idea of using a subject and materials that are taken directly form our personal surroundings.

Archiving Objects

I have discussed how it seems important that the viewer has an understanding of the objects within the work and their significance\ symbolism.


                                                  I am thinking about how my objects could be  displayed and explained.      

I have bought some little acrylic drawers and am experimenting with using them to display objects. The  transparency is useful and the way they suggest perhaps archival material in the store room of a museum.

The clean, clear acrylic makes it easy to see the contents and against a white background, the colours look bright and vivid.
It might be interesting for viewers to look at the objects, then try to spot them in the images.

                                                     I would like viewers to be able to open the drawers and look more              
  closely at the contents. However, there may be health and safety issues (particularly with anti-psychotic drugs!)

I would also have to consider that young children may be present and might want to put beads and other things in their mouths(or pockets!)

Perhaps I could leave the drawers accessible for the assessment and external examiners, then super glue them closed.


At the moment, the bright shiny objects look attractive and draw
        the eye.

But when their significance is known, perhaps the bright, seductive colours and shapes will serve to mock the attraction as they represent negative, depressing events and conditions that plague me.
This jewellery has lost its lustre as it has a coating of soot from my house fire. It is interesting to take out and handle.



What might the less attractive substances look like displayed in this manner?



Drugs look like sweets. They also have a lure that appeals to a childhood sweet tooth and curiosity.

But how about feces?
It still looks quite contained and clinical.
This would definitely need to be glued safely closed!

The other practical issue I would need to consider is that of unpleasant smells. I think that mildly assaulting the viewer's sense of smell as well as vision would add more meaning to my work. After all, I am dealing with a difficult and unsettling subject, so a nasty smell would add strength to that message.

Here is one set of draws with different objects in each layer. I would have to display them at an optimal eye-level. 

Would I attach them to the wall? 

In that case whatever was used to attach them might show through the acrylic-spoiling the effect.

Perhaps a narrow shelf along the wall under the images would be better?

The next question is that of explaining a little about each drawer of objects.

A little label might be in keeping with the museum idea. I love the beautifully written labels in museums like the Foundling Museum, where each object brought in by the mother with her child is carefully labelled in copperplate script.

The label in the above image does not match the contents. I would have to plan what to write on each label, as there is not much space to write on to deliver a meaningful message.

Indexing All my Shit

As well as forcing objects representing negative things in my life into abeyance, I thought it might be interesting to catalogue them too. I have found a perspex card indexing box, with alphabetical dividers.

If I write a detailed, informative paragraph about each object used in the work it will add to the sense of recording and preserving them. It might help me to feel that they have been logged, forced into submission in an image, catalogued, and put away in a little box. Maybe this process will be cathartic in helping to lock away bad stuff and move on in a lighter frame of mind??

 Many artists such as Yayoi Kusama, Louise Bourgeois and Tracy Emin used and use their work as therapy. So I am following in their footsteps.

Picnic Interlude

Rebecca Thomas organised a picnic shoot for all of us in Hatfield House gardens.

We all joined in for a group shoot for Lisa, then did our own things.

I played around with a  Polaroid camera with very little success. The shutter through which the exposed image slides was not narrow enough. So the emulsion did not spread across the image enough.



I then set up some insect tea party sets. I was looking at the annoying occurrence of insects invariably spoiling the picnic! These plastic ones don't look too threatening though!

After I had finished with the food, I did a 'Mash up' set after Cindy Sherman's series of food and vomit images set up on the beach. I believe she was commenting on self-loathing and eating disorders.

From a section of this image I made a multiple kaleidoscope image.

I love the way any kind of mess can be made into a neat, ordered, attractive image. This again represents what I am trying to do with things that vex me!

Here are are couple more multiplied images:

The sense of balance and control work well in this image I think.

 A neat and precise picnic where those insects will never be able to eat the jam tarts.

In this one I used the area of shadow under the glass cake stand. Combined with a section of the paper doily, it makes a calm swirling, flowing pattern.

Childwickbury Art Fair

Collating and Documentation

At this stage of the development process towards my final work, I want to record and 'fix' the materials in my final pieces. As was discussed in the M.A symposium recently, there seem to be natural points in the development process when a mark needs to be made and documentation recorded.

This is a more detailed interpretation of the symbols I have chosen for the still life images. As McLuhan said, documentation is a process that extends the memory, which is very necessary for me!. This blog also makes my private thoughts and processes public, which I have found difficult, but important  to do.
As I have said before, my work acts as a form of therapy. In a similar way, Yayio Kusama felt that her work kept her sane.

Cigarette Buts and Ash.
I am trying to show the invasive, sickening effect that having two smokers in my life has on them, their bodies and ME. The butts are dirty, twisted and stained with rain seepage. The filters show dark staining where the chemicals have been drawn through, into the body. I have sprinkled the ash over the plate and the flower, to show how this habit has a far-reaching effect on my life. I am worried about the health of my loved ones, but on a more superficial level I hate the all invading smell, the sight of cigarette ends in the garden, and the anti social craving the addiction causes.

Slugs and Snails 

These are not life-threatening, but are a constant cause of annoyance in my life. I don'y like to use strong pesticides, so I go on 'snail patrol' every morning, while there is still dew, and collect slugs and snails in a bucket. Then I walk down to the end of the road and tip them over the fence into the woods.

I read that they have to be dumped at least 20 metres away or they just come back again!

I keep a tally in my head each day, and the average is about 12 of the little blighters. I have lost whole plants like hollyhocks and delphiniums, so I have to remain vigilant!

Ear Plugs

These represent my insomnia. Anxiety keeps me awake, then wakes me again in the night. I have got into the habit of writing in my notebook whenever I wake so at least I feel there is something positive about it. I have had some good ideas this way, and remembered things that I couldn't the day before.

I am a very light sleeper, so any sounds, like snoring wake me up straight away too. Lack of sleep is a terrible strain on my energy.

Meat, Blood and Bones

These represent what Julia Kristeva has defined as Abject. The things that remind us of our mortality and so try to ignore and push away. For me they represent physical problems I have; particularly a degenerative spine condition caused by my active and accident prone younger life. I enjoyed hockey, lacross, athletics, gymnastics, riding, climbing, skiing, canoeing, sailing, diving, dancing. These activities made me very happy and satisfied a craving for excitement and challenge. I am now severely limited to boring lengths in the pool and hours of cycling to keep fit. 

My Poor body is damaged and can't be repaired and that makes me very sad and frustrated.

The organic matter also represents physical abuse I have suffered, causing broken bones and lots of blood.

Beads

When a necklace is constructed, colours, shapes, sizes and materials are selected to go well together and compliment each other. This reminds me of friendships and relationships with family. When a necklace is broken, the beads are scattered and are rarely found and put back together again. I lost my best friend in the Tsunami and my first husband to manic-depression. The beads represent those losses and the memories of loved ones.

Curtain Hooks

Growing up, I had the same bedroom for about 18 years. The curtains were hung on a 1950s wooden track, with sharp curtain hooks attached to wooden balls  travelling along the track. Except they didn't! They got stuck every day and I had to balance on the bed and move each one individually to get the curtain to open or close. The hooks would prick my fingers and the whole process was very annoying!!

My mum sent me some of the old hooks when she finally modernised the track, so I have included them as one of the annoying memories.

Rotten Fruit

With reference to the still life paintings of the Dutch Masters, I have included this element to represent decay, ageing and death. It is a memento mori to remind me that I have to make the most of life, but also that my death and that of my loved ones is inevitable.

Jewellery

I have included some jewellery that has survived a fire which started in my bedroom two years ago. I lost a lot of precious things and had to go to hospital for smoke inhalation. My face, clothes and hair were black. The objects are bent by heat and blackened with soot. They represent survival and  endurance. But also loss.

A White Flower

In this case, a white orchid.

Very corny, this. But with reference to Elizabethan symbolism, the flower represents purity; my 'will' or 'spirit'. We all need to be strong to face adversities in our lives and keep moving forward, finding joy. Although the flower is knocked and damaged by the other elements in the still life, it is still beautiful. 

Drugs

Again, these are symbolic of the misery of Mental Health problems that have plagued my life for the last 30 years. 

Grey Hair

Another inevitable sign of ageing, which I have decided to embrace by no longer dying my hair.

Sometimes it gets me down that I am older than I feel and I hate my reflection in the mirror. I feel that life has been unkind to me and I would look better if I had fewer stressors-less shit in my life. But that's just vanity.

Human Waste

Representing the abject and encapsulating the message of my work now. I have a lot of shit to deal with on a daily basis. And just like the human process of ejecting waste, it is constant.

Insects

When I was researching disgust and what humans found most disgusting, insects came high on the list as they were considered to be carriers of disease. I have used insects as a symbol of decay and the inevitability of death, as did the Old Masters.

Background

Finally, I use two kinds of doily in the background, beneath the glass plate. These represent my attempts to keep up appearances and try to hold everything together in my roles as Mother, Wife, Friend, Daughter, Teacher and Student.